“Are you crying again?”, he asked me. And I laughed a bit at that question. He asks it to me every time probably remembering my over-active tear glands. It is not the normal sad scenes in movies that move me, but the characters which go on in spite of the impossible looking goals. It is the expression of genuine feelings which some of the actors manage to duplicate on-screen which brings me to tears rather than the loud acting.
Music is my bane and also my way to let out feelings. Sad songs…inspiring songs (this one is the latest favourite), ghazals…always take me in that situation and never fail to mist the eyes. Instrumental music (like flute) especially the evening ragas..bring out unexplained emotions which is generally ignored in the daily routines.
Tears come easily to me. I cannot bottle up my feelings inside. If I feel sad or depressed or too frustrated or even angry (hate myself for that…whoever heard of tears in anger), or even in happy situations sometimes…they pop out…every time…unfailingly. Most of the times I manage to hide them, though letting them fall freely. It cleanses the heart and allows mind to think clearly. Sometimes I feel it is like puking…if you get the feeling, it is better you do it and feel better rather than take medicine to avoid it. Similarly, it is better you cry and get over the feelings rather than keep them festering in mind, and letting them out through some other ways. Not good at all.